The Summer of My Discontent

558293_10151131613270185_511373883_n[1]I am a terrible mother.  No, no – stop.  Don’t try to contradict me!  I am.  Don’t get me wrong – I LOVE the bones of my kids.  I do almost everything and anything I can for them.  But I’m still a bad mom.  I have an awful secret…

I’m dreading their summer vacation from school.

There.  I’ve said it.  Judge me as you see fit.

I love my kids.  All the time.  Does that mean I want to SPEND all the time with them?  Nope.

See?  Told you.  I’m a horrible mother.

I see tweets and Facebook statuses from super-moms who are actually EXCITED by the prospect of having their kids in their hair, I mean, at home, ALL summer.  I would like to have what they’re having.  I am envious of their motherly joy and anticipation of more time with their children.

I discussed this recently with a friend, who claimed she “can’t wait” for summer holidays.  When I asked her why, she had 2 reasons:  she wouldn’t have to get up early and get her 4 kidlets out the door for school every morning (FOUR! Lordy, Lordy, how DOES she do it??), and she felt a sense of relief that they were more safe under her watchful eye than when they were at school, where she worries about them.

The not-having-to-get-up part I get, although I will categorically state that this chick who loves sleep will GLADLY get up at 6:30am if it means a full day of free babysitting at the local JK classroom.  The safety part I’d never even considered.  I hope they are just as safe at school as they are at home.

I’m not the Martha Stewart of mothering, I confess.  I do not have all kinds of fun crafts and activities planned for my kids to do over the summer.  I’ve planned swimming lessons, dance camp and nature camps.  But not for them, for me.  For MY benefit.  I’ve strategically registered them for camp or activities every other week so that I have some sort of break after spending a full week WITH them.

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Told ya so.  Bad mama.

And my kidlets are not even BAD kids.  They are easily entertained with the TV, iPad, LeapPad, laptop, colouring or X-Box.  Note the lack of adult involvement required for these activities.  I have it good, I know.  Yet somehow having to give up my 2 or 3 days a week of silence is what I’m crying over (Captain Sassypants only goes to school every other day for this past year).  My kids are TALKERS.  Non-stop talkers.  Constant talkers.  And sadly, not the kind that talks to themselves.  They expect verbal interaction.  With me.  Sometimes about the most incredibly boring topics you could never wish to imagine.

Or they squabble and whine.  OH, the squabbling and whining.  Did I mention the backtalk?

My kids are GOOD kids, lest you think they are little monsters based on how I’m whining here myself.  They really are, everyone tells me so.

It’s not about them.  It’s me.  I’m a rotten mom, like I said.

I have exactly FOUR more days of freedom..uhh, school left for Baby Girl.  Four.  Then will begin the summer of my discontent…

Please somebody tell me I’m not the only mom who feels this way – give my misery some company.


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12 thoughts on “The Summer of My Discontent

  1. Oh ya! I hear ya —and I only have one to worry about. Two, sometimes three boys (a his, mine and ours scenario)–17 (who is working 10 hour days 6 days a week as a lifeguard for the summer before University) 14 (who lives with his mom but is here often)…and 8. Yeah 8. 17+8= awesome—so lucky to have them both love to hang out with each other —lego–video games–board games —reading—playing with little tiny figures on the floor for HOURS. 14+8 =awesome–video games—baseball–road hockey–pillow fights—balloon volleyball….. But with 17 working –and 14 not here–and Spouse travelling for work —it is 8+46 year old mom on stress leave from work….Oh yah…so I get it…..I totally get it! LOL Today I have played baseball, gone for a walk with the dogs, made banana bread, done gardening and cooked dinners and lunches and gotten groceries. Phew–now for tomorrow…..Thanks for posting–I feel less guilty that I am looking forward to Sept….(love you 17, 14 and 8!!!)

    • Sometimes combo-deal kids can entertain each other, but sooner or later, it falls apart in my house and that sucks, doesn’t it? Your day sounds great! Today I did laundry and tried to do something fun and “crafty” with my Baby Girl, who then decided that she wanted to print her “a”s the way books and computers do, but somehow couldn’t get it right and had a raging tantrum…Day 2 of Summer – 1 point, mommy – zero. Oh well – only 60 more to go!!! Thanks for your comment – hang in there!

  2. That is so cool that you have a mom group willing to get dressed and have lunch together! My mom posse and I drop our kids off and sit in our pj’s on our own couches at home and talk on the phone for 2 hours, coffee in hand… I have a cure for “Mom, I’m boooorrrreeeedddd!”. I tell them to find something to do, or I will. *Tumbleweeds rolling around* They know what I find for them to do will be far less enjoyable than whatever they’re bored not doing! Enjoy your lunch and your summer!

  3. Some moms and I are having lunch tomorrow in an effort to squeeze in more adult fun (I totally don’t mean that in a creepy way) before our kiddos are home for the summer. I’m a mixed bag on it. Love not having to get up early, but I dread the boredom/fighting. By the time fall hits, everyone is ready for school to start again! 🙂

  4. Full disclosure: I am the mom of 4 mentioned in the blog. I totally get your point and feelings about summer being a full time-no pay-mentally draining MARATHON. I really REALLY get it by the time 5:30p.m. rolls around and my husband finally gets home from work. Pinot is my friend. (smile). It’s just that if I wasn’t busy running my marathon, I might notice all the items left on my “Life Goal ” list that Oprah told me to write but never told me how to fulfill. How ruuude! Seriously though, We, as mothers, are awesome no matter how we prefer to do our heavy-lifting. Marathons, sprints, or something in between, we are all in the race! Have a great summer everyone!

    • Another “Anonymous”! Good people reading these comments – it is not me writing them, honest! (Except the ones with my picture beside them). As for modified school year – FAB idea, but sadly not offered anywhere near where I live : ((

  5. Thank you “Anonymous” for backing me up. Anonymously. So it looks like it was me who wrote this comment supporting myself…lol (Just kidding. I know who wrote this comment, it comes through in my email notification. It was a real person that I know, who no doubt cares more than I do about people knowing she doesn’t want to hang out with her own kids all summer. Don’t worry Kelly..I mean “Anonymous” – your secret’s safe with me!)

  6. I’m totally, 100% with you. I could have written this myself (except I couldn’t because I don’t write as well as you)!

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